Hello all,
just a big shout to everyone who is coming to see us tomorrow night @ Freedom festival in Pristina, looks like a great lineup and we can't wait for the show.
David is likely to be quite sad as England are going to beat USA in the world cup so be gentle with him.
see you there
Rich
Hello. It's your old friend Crazy Eddie with something very special just for you. I can't believe you don't know me. I was the number one, best selling Tin Man in the Tri-state area for 3 years running. "Crazy Eddie's Used Car Dealership: He'd Give Them Away, But His Wife Won't Let Him !" That was my catchphrase. Who needs fancy schmancy ad agencies, I come up with these golden nuggets all by myself. You must have seen the ads and billboards. What are you, some kind of Wiseacre?
I don't run the dealership anymore. Its a long story so I'll just cut to the superfluous crap and drag it out as much as possible. When you lend your ear to Crazy Eddie, you don't expect to get it back anytime soon. Am I right? Of course I am. Jeez, who let all the Fruit Loops out of the box?
Anywho, once upon a time, I was selling cars left, right and center so fast I didn't know if I was coming or going. I literally had used cars driving out of my ass ! Maybe selling is the wrong word because I was selling them at such out of control, rock bottom prices, I was selling them for nothing. You heard me right, Genius. Nothing. My wife said "Eddie, You're Crazy! You'll go broke and I'll leave you for the nearest truck driver I can find". Ive got to hand it to that Dame. She must have had a crystal ball or something, because she was right. It seemed like the more popular my business became, the closer I was to bankruptcy. It was a real Catch - 29 situation. By the way Einstein, I know the phrase is more commonly known as Catch - 22, but this was way worse than that so don't get wise. Well, I just kept giving those cars away and true to her word, I did indeed go bust and she really did leave me for a truck driver. In fact, I sold that Goddamn trucker his Chevy rig for the princely sum of zero dollars. Other guys, might have made more money, but no salesman in Hackensack or Scranton or Nimrod or any other place in the Tri - State area could match my sales record.
Well after that came a period that I refer to now as my "wilderness" years. With no dough and no special lady I just kinda wandered around in the economic desert for some time. I had tasted those dizzying heights of fame and I just couldn't buckle down with any old 9 to 5 gig. Oh sure, I did some top secret government work that was very hush hush. I can't talk about it too much on account of it being top secret and all, but let's just say International Diplomacy was involved. Hell, even when I was giving away cars on the lot, International Diplomacy was a bit of a hobby for me. That and brain surgery. I better 86 the yakkin' because I already said too much. So do me a solid, Dollface and keep it under your hat and on the QT or Crazy Eddie will be forcibly reincarnated as a grease spot.
So by now you must be thinking to yourself "Gee Eddie, you're a fascinating guy and you sure do keep us spellbound with your amazing anecdotes, but what in the Sam Blazes does all this have to do with Red Snapper ? Well cool your jets, Maverick because I'm about to tell you. I work for Red Snapper now. They pay me to tell every Yahoo on the Intranet, on every SpaceFace and Mybook site all about the new music that Red Snapper are giving away free. Actually , those guys wouldn't dream of insulting my intelligence by paying me actual money, but they do let me have all the Red Snapper downloads I want. At first I thought their music was too arty-farty for me and it is true that some of it you need a college diploma to listen to it properly, but believe me, at prices like these, it's really growing on me.
Did I mention free? That's right Cupcake, nada. All they want in return is your address to make them feel important and how much does an address cost, Egghead ? Right again, Zilch. This is the kind of business model that ole' Crazy Eddie really understands.
What does nothing buy you these days? Not Much ! For instance, zero donuts would buy you zero donuts. It will however, buy you Red Snapper downloads so don't delay. By the way, this isn't mouldy old stuff they found in the cupboard. These are fresh juicy tracks straight from the oven, so get 'em while they're hot. Now how much would you (not) pay ? Don't answer ! Because if you act now I'll throw in a 117 pice set of Jujitsu steak knives. Plus, a Ronco vegematic that slices AND dices. Even if you hate music you gotta love a bargain. One track I downloaded 243 times. I really like it and Ive since noticed more hair on my chest and I seem to be more in touch with my sensitive side
Those Red Snapper guys are funny. Not in a ha-ha way but more of an oddball way. Especially the drummer. He hits those drums so hard, I think he's trying to kill them. One day he just might succeed. And what about that Bass Fiddle guy? He looks like he's playing in a soccer game instead of a beat combo. A ladies soccer game. Give them a chance though, because they sure got my toes to tapping. Don't forget its free,free,free, which is sweet music to my ears. But hurry, I know Im crazy, but even I can see it won't last forever with the Crazy Eddy business plan. Tell 'em I sent you.
Hello Everyone,
Have a listen to my mix that is waiting for you.
We will be adding mixes each month.
THIS MONTH MY THINGS: Music - Doom
Film - Caradog James - Little white lies
Food - Peanut Puffs
Book - Rusty Young - Marching Powder
Weather - Belting Welsh sunshine
Furniture - My Hammock
Plans - The World Cup/Summer Holidays
See you all in Pristina, Kosovo for the England/USA game and Snapper show June 12th
Rich x
